Rebirth Read online

  I could not say how many centuries had passed us when we made the decision to leave our Eden. We wanted to use our abilities to aid our fellow man, show God that we withheld no grudges in hopes that we would one day be welcomed into Heaven. Immortal, we were truly in Purgatory, and we vowed to repent. We wished to shed the curse of never-ending life and followed the teachings we knew from heart. With the ability to perform miracles, we sought to do the world good. Unfortunately, we only found chaos. The world had turned violent in our absence, and our efforts fueled new wars. Our return brought centuries of disasters and death to those living mortal lives. Please forgive our ignorance. We were no better than children as we squabbled the land, not realizing how devastating the smallest use of our abilities could cause.

  Tired of our miseries, Hotan aimed to shield his people. It was not fair that the others were being punished for his own faults. They debated for quite some time before everyone agreed to what was being offered. With the use of the powers of Rebirth, he could wash their souls clean; bring them close to mortality in an endless cycle of reincarnation. They would not know themselves or each other. It was a means of blending back into the rhythm of the world, leaving behind the memories of their cursed life. One would have to stay behind, be left out of this spell to watch over them. The fear of awakening, possibly not remembering themselves and causing more disasters, pulled at all of them. Talib, one of the chieftain brothers and element of Judgment, volunteered to stay behind. May God bless him and mend the pain that it caused him to watch both his wife, Saphellia, and brother, Hotan, disappear from existence. May my sins be forgiven for what I have done.

  Chapter Nine

  “That’s deep.” Kyle lay across his bed, furrowing his brow.

  “There’s the problem, though. We are under a spell that’s falling apart for some reason. I am Rebirth, and technically, the one who originally cast it.” Hotan closed the book, staring at the old red leather cover. “Regardless of why this is failing, I am slowly becoming immortal. At the rate things are going, eventually it’ll be harder to blend in with normal society. If you never age or die, someone is bound to notice. I wonder how long ago this awakening started. Who was the first to wake up and regain immortality? Maybe we can figure out what went wrong if we can figure out who was the first to snap out of the spell. Perhaps Talib knows. I couldn’t imagine he would not notice another coming into existence again without sensing it.”

  “Yea, it does seem strange. Did you lose your powers at some point? A bad reincarnation along the timeline?” Kyle looked at Hotan who stared out the window at doves pecking at the grass. “It has something to do with you right? You’re the reincarnated version of the man who casted this spell in the first place.”

  “All I know is that I’m not the Hotan in this book.” With a heavy sigh, he looked back to Kyle. “The Hotan who initiated the spell is dead and I’m what’s left. He used his powers to remake the element of Rebirth, but I don’t know why. He was tight-lipped about the reason he felt the need to do this, other than making the element stronger.”

  “What are you saying?” Kyle sat up, digesting the information Hotan was letting loose. “How do you know? You sound like you met him somehow. There can’t be two of you, is there?”

  “No there isn’t two of us. I know this about him for the same reason why I knew to look for the book. It wasn’t Talib who told me about it, it was Hotan himself.” He put the book into his book bag. “In a dream, he came to me. I don’t know why, but, something told me it wasn’t an ordinary dream. I could feel something. I can’t seem to find the words to describe what I felt, but it was like a locked section of myself coming to life for that small moment and then fading to nothing.”

  “Hold on, you’re not making any sense man.” Kyle watched as Hotan flopped the book bag on, ready to make an exit. “Now you’re talking all crazy again, dude. This is insane.”

  “I’ve got to go.” He opened Kyle’s door. “See you tomorrow at school.”

  “You better explain to me what the hell you’re talking about.” Kyle watched as he left, closing the door behind him. “This is taking its toll on him, Talib. Why aren’t you helping him?”

  The English teacher finished his lecture and passed out dittos. As usual, they were to be finished before class ended. It was one of those casual, laid-back days and the teacher just wanted to relax. Hotan couldn’t complain. It was nice to enjoy some quiet class time for a change. He zoomed through the paper, answering correctly, no studying or flipping through the book like the rest of the class. Shoving it to the side, he took a deep breath. The feeling of mental exhaustion flooded over him. He had no desire to engage himself into anything that may require any thought. Shellie scooted her desk closer and stared at his unusual empty glance, worry written on her face.

  “What’s wrong with you? You’ve been really weird here lately and it’s got me worried.” She sighed grabbing his right hand catching his full attention. “Are you ok? Are you still feeling sick?”

  “I wish I really knew.” He stared at her hand clasping his. His hand was bigger, her fingers thin and dainty compared to his fat stubby ones. Content with holding hands, he found himself smirking. “I’ve got so much on my mind. I feel like it’s eating me alive, inside out. There’s no longer a definitive line between what’s real or fantasy and it’s frustrating. All I can do is lose myself to my thoughts, driving myself crazy wading through what is fact or fiction. I’m exhausted.”

  “It seems that way.” Letting go, she focused on her ditto to avoid the teacher’s glance as she continued to whisper to him. “If there’s anything I can do, let me know. I’m always here. You know you can talk to me. I just want to know what’s going on, even if I can’t help.”

  “I’ll be fine.” He laid his head down on his arms, closing his eyes. “Just wish you could help. I’m just so tired. I can’t sleep lately. It’s like my body is slowly losing its want for sleeping and eating. Physically I feel fine, but mentally and emotionally, I miss the break from existence.”

  “This is not a group activity you two.” The teacher cleared his throat, watching Shellie scoot her desk back into place. “Thank you, Ms. Hoffman.”

  Feeling drained from his life’s crisis, Hotan let himself drift. His mind was constantly asking questions with no answers to be found. Sleeping was impossible with so much left open and unresolved. Worse, was that everything seemed to cycle back to him. He was the problem and the answer, but no one could help him.

  Taking a deep breath, his ears took in the sounds of papers rustling and occasionally someone coughing or rustling in their seats. Hunger and sleep on a physical sense hadn’t been hitting him like normal. Waves of anxiety had been hitting him when 12 plus hours had passed and he failed in feeling hungry.

  Is this part of becoming immortal? No more sleep or need to eat? Or am I that swamped with this whole chain of events? Please body, just let me sleep so I can just stop thinking. I can’t focus on anything if all I want is to lay my head down and make all these questions stop. If I can get some answers at best, maybe I could get some rest. Where is Talib? Why isn’t he helping me? I haven’t heard, seen, or even gotten a letter from him. What an ass. He came and threw this all in my face, leaving. I would write a note back but I don’t like that Jacob guy. Really ticks me off that Annie’s all in love with him. It’s not right that these immortals play with people’s emotions. Geliah can screw someone for life with the ability to manipulate a person’s sense of fear. This whole ordeal is unfair.

  Heavy with his thoughts, they came to a stop as he began to fall asleep.

  “Hotan,” He heard a voice call him in the darkness of his mind. “Hotan can you hear me?”

  “Who, is this?” No longer could he hear the classroom, Am I dreaming again? Did I finally fall asleep? “What do you want?”

  “Hotan,” The voice was new to him, but soft and desperate. “I need you to find me. I need help.”

  “Find you? Who are you?” This
wasn’t the voice of the old Hotan, nor of anyone he knew of in person. “Why me?”

  “I can’t leave from this place until you find me, I am trapped here. I fear for my life. Geliah will not allow me to leave.” The fear in the man’s voice sent chills across Hotan. “My only hope is that you can help me pull out from under his control. I cannot push pass the fear he instills on me, I am too weak.”

  “Leave where?” Hotan thought loudly as if shouting out over a great distance. “How can I find you? Geliah is too strong for me to even face!”

  “Here, I am here in the city at the…” The voice faded, his mind went silent. Feeling a hand glide across his marking caused him to jerk awake.

  “Don’t touch me!” The shout from him bounced off the walls of the classroom. Shellie’s startled face told him all he needed to know. “Shellie, I, sorry, I didn’t mean to shout, I’m so sorry.”

  “It’s ok. You scared me.” Her eyes were sad and watery as she gathered her things. “The bell rang, didn’t want you to be late.”

  “Uh,” Throwing his things in his book bag, he collected her books from her. “Here, let me carry these.”

  “Hotan, I can carry them.” Her voice sounded spiteful as she glared at him. “I’m fine.”

  “No, but.” Seeing her anger from her face, he had hurt her feelings in being so abrasive.

  The violent reaction had broken her last piece of patience in figuring out what was wrong with him.

  I am going to have to try and tell her. Maybe talking about it might help me clear some thoughts.

  “I’ve got something to show you. Let’s go someplace and talk.” He whispered, beckoning her to stay close.

  “Show me?” She followed him out of the classroom through the crowded hall. “Show me what? Hotan, slow down! Where are we going?”

  “Follow me.” Taking a swift turn to the left and out an exit door, he led her through the courtyard. No one was present but the two of them. “I want to show you this. It might help you understand why I’m acting weird. Come on this way. Keep this secret.”

  “Show me what? Keep what a secret? You’re scaring me…” She quickened her pace to keep up with him. “Where are we going?”

  Keeping quiet, he led her into the school Greenhouse and laid their things on an empty plant table. Far as he could see, they were alone.

  “Why did you lead me here?” Closing the door behind her, she stared at him baffled.

  “I’ve got to tell you something. It’s about what’s been wrong with me these past few weeks.” I hope she doesn’t tell me I’m crazy. Sighing he continued, “It’s all so irrational, so talking about it just makes me feel crazy. I don’t have any answers for all of it, and some of it I am having a hard time taking it as real.”

  “Hotan, what’s going on with you?” Her eyes widened as she shifted her stance. “Is, everything ok? Are you on drugs or something? Hallucinating? Delusional?”

  “That’s the problem. I wish I could say yes, even maybe to some of those, but I can’t.” He looked her in the eyes as his jaw tensed. “I’m not sure what kind of situation I’m in at the moment. It’s not drugs. I promise you that.”

  “What is the situation then?” He could feel her growing uneasy. “Are you involved in something really bad?”

  “Well, we’ve been dating for what, like 2 years now, right?” It was confusing her, but she was doing her best to keep up. “If I was doing something, you would know about it, right?”

  “Yea?” She answered cautiously. “What does that have to do with what’s wrong with you now? Is it something to do with me? Are we breaking up? Because you could have done that in a more blunt manner-”

  “No. Maybe if you see this you could understand why I’m so confused. Things are so out of place and complicated.” Taking off his baggy shirt, he turned to expose his back to her. “Take a look. You know very well this was never here.”

  Silently she gawked at the tattooed wings that laid across his entire back. “When did you get a tattoo? That covers your entire back! Where on earth did you get the money for something like that?”

  “I didn’t. I woke up and it was just there all of a sudden.” He glanced over his shoulder to see her pale face. “I’m telling you. The things going on with me are not normal. I feel like I’m in some other realm.”

  “It just appeared? But it’s huge.” She walked closer, hesitant to touch it. “Wow, looks like it’s been there for years. It just surfaced, this is wild, it looks like tribal angel wings. It’s amazing, but beautiful. When did it show up?”

  “The day you guys found me in the church. It was just there, no scabs, oozing or puffiness, like you see with a tattoo. I’m stuck with it for sure.”

  “Is it okay to touch?” She stared at him as he pondered on the answer.

  “Go ahead.” He felt her soft warm hands glide over his back following the design gently. “There’s no difference between my skin and the mark. It’s crazy. I can’t find much information on any chemicals or conditions that could cause it. I mean silver nitrate exposure, but it’s not permanent and-”

  “That’s weird.” Her voice awkward in tone as it hit his ears. “It, well, it is the same as your skin. No signs of scarring or anything, but-”

  “What is it?” His stomach twisted and tightened, making him nervous. “What’s weird?”

  “The marking, well, its icy cold on one wing and hot on the other.” She ran her hand over back again to ensure she wasn’t mistaken. “Yea, it’s a completely different temperature than the rest of your skin, Hotan. That’s crazy.”

  “Cold and hot?” A sense of unease washed over him. Is that a sign that it holds power?

  “Seriously Hotan, it’s like ice on the Left side and feverish on the right. It’s wild. No wonder you’ve been so secretive, this is crazy. Have you seen a doctor maybe? Maybe there is something going wrong with your body?”

  “No, no doctors. It’s not like I have the money and with my luck I would end up as a lab rat.” He put his shirt back on. “I just have to figure out what it all means.” Talib said I was slowly becoming immortal. Maybe this is part of that…

  “You have any idea why something like that would suddenly show up? Have you figured out what triggered it or you passing out? I couldn’t imagine where to begin to look for answers on something like this.” Shellie was troubled by his lack of seeing a doctor. “I would have gone to a doctor. Are you feeling ok?”

  “It’s nothing a doctor can help me with. It’s a whole lot stranger, and yes, I feel fine. If I figure this whole thing out I’ll let you know more, but for now, I’ll just clue you in. You deserve that much, but I don’t want you getting involved with this whole mess. I need you focused for me, I need to know when I am with you, this can be put to the side. It’s nice not to have to think about it when you’re around.”

  “I see.” She nodded, giving him a faint smile but it faded. “But at least I know sort of what’s going on in that head of yours.”

  “Yea,” He handed her books back to her as he kissed her cheek, whispering, “Sorry for making you late to class.”

  “No worries, it’s worth it.” She hugged him tight and he relaxed in her warmth. “You know I love you, right? Don’t be afraid to talk to me next time. I don’t care if I don’t understand one word you say to me. Just hearing you tell me your problems at least makes me feel like I can do something for the person I care most about.”

  “Yea I know.” A smile crept across his face as he caught a scent of her perfume. “You better get going.”

  They kissed for a moment before he watched her leave the greenhouse. Feeling relieved, it felt nice to explain something to Shellie. At least he could rest easier tonight that Shellie didn’t think he was ditching her. He made his way through the empty hallways as classes were in full stride. Paying no attention to the janitor emptying out an overfilled trashcan, he passed the classroom doors. Slowing down, he watched the faces of students in each window.

  Onl
y a few weeks ago I was no different from them, just a student with no real worries in this world. Nothing expected of me besides simply being a kid. Now I’m stripped of that comfort, forced to find out who I really am – well – who I was. I’m nothing like them. I am a recycled version of someone else, nothing more. I need to figure out this puzzle and either pick up with my forgotten life or get back to making my own. It all seems so unfair.

  Going up the stairs, he passed another student who paid him no heed as he entered a door quietly. Mrs. Bothirsen shoved her glasses up giving him a displeased glare. He sat down in his seat, ignoring her burning stare.

  “Page 223.” A soft whisper came through his thoughts.

  “Huh?” Snapping out of his trance, he looked over at the girl in the desk next to him.

  “We’re on page 223. She assigned problems 1 thru 50, only even.” She smiled sweetly at him; her pigtails covered her eyes from his view.

  “Oh.” He pulled out his book and started to flip through it. “So what’s your name? I keep meaning to ask you.”

  “Metsy,” She started to work on her problems. “That’s ok, nice to meet you Hotan.”

  “Thank you, Metsy.” He looked over at her. “You help me all the time and I forget to tell you thank you.”

  “No problem.” Focusing on the assignment in front of her, he could see her smile.

  The light color of her hair must mean she was blonde. She dressed in a punk rocker style, leggings, skirt, black boots, and a logo shirt over a long sleeve shirt. Several times she had helped him out when the teacher had been condescending. Without Metsy, he wouldn’t be surviving the class. Metsy had always been nice to him no matter what the risk may have been for her.

  When Ms. Bothirsen and he argued, it was obvious how uncomfortable the other students were shifting in their seats. No one understood why she had so many problems with a straight A student who was quiet in class. Intimidation was the only thing Hotan could conclude. Sighing, he worked on the assignment, zooming through the problems effortlessly. He closed his papers in the math book, setting them to the side.